this is my story...

2006-12-15T01:27:00.000-08:00

grabe ngayon, sobrang may isang taong sumira ng araw ko. grabe lang talaga. bakit hndi na lang kasi sabihin ang dapat sabihin. kung may sasabihin ka, sabihin mo na! hindi yung nasa harap tayo ng ibang tao tapos sasabihan mo ko ng..."kakausapin kita" or "mag usap tayo". grabe. naiinis na tlaga ko sayo. grabe. sana tlaga! arrgh! pero dahil mabait ako, i won't mention your name. pero pag ako napuno, sige lang...tabla tabla tayo. ganyan-ganyanin mo ko...sige lang!you've been acting weird. grabe. i hate it when you're around. if i only have a choice, matagal ko ng ginawa. haha. :) dba dba? galit na galit na ko nyan. oo, galit na galit ako. isa kang malaking panira sa mundo ko. will you pls....uhhh, go away? NOW. as in...go...maglaho..mawala..arrgh! galit ako sayo. galit. AS IN GALIT. and nothing can ever take this anger from me. grabe, tandaan mo lang talaga tong araw na to. dec 15,2006..friday...you ruined my day. oh well, how i wish i could do the same thing. pero, mabait ako..so i won't go down to your level. haha. so so so average. :) huwag na huwag mo lang pagtitripan ang isang bagay na importante sakin ngayon. grabe, pag ginawa mo yan, magsunugan na lang tayo ng bahay. sige lang, subukan mo lang! tinawag mo ko one time, and then you told me na nagbago ako...oh well, changes occur..so pls, don't act as if you're not having yours. tao ka lang, tao lang rin ako...changes occur to people. ang tanong, tao ka nga ba talaga? naiinis na ko. isang-isa na lang talaga..isang isa na lang!

so yun, dahil nga nasira yung araw ko, i just went on with the day as if hindi ko na lang narinig yung boses niya, or hindi ko na lang sya nakita, or hindi ko na lang siya kilala, or walang kahit anong connection sa kanya! grabe..inis na inis na ko. pag eto lang talaga pinalaki mo pa,palalakihin ko rin...haha! cge, para fair..para quits.. :)

oh well, saya ng intrams! go team!

2006-12-14T01:49:00.000-08:00

today was kind of one my hardest days in school. pano ba naman kse,wala ako sa tamang pag iisip kanina. i failed my cl quiz, which is my second failed quiz, and which is also our second quiz for the qtr...that means,yung first two quizzes ko, bagsak. so what can i say dba?cl na nga lang, bagsak bagsak pa ko. grabe, i think ms malayas is watching over my changes. ang tamad tamad ko ng mag aral grabe. isa pa, noli is kind of hard for me.first of all, it's hard to study na iba iba yung libro niyo.eh yung ginagamit kong libro, yung pinabili ng school, na medyo kulang kulang. eh what can i learn from a book na kulang kulang? eh di pati utak ko nyan kulang kulang din ang alam. so there, i have to read uhhhh, 2 books para lng sa isang subject.eh if i only have the choice,hndi ako magbabasa..kaya lng,ako mahihirapan.eh ayun.galing kse ni rizal eh. grabe. so yun yun yun. kanina na naman, umiral na naman ang pagkasakitin ko. so, kanina, naka jacket ako maghapon kahit nakabilad kami sa field. bakit? eh kse naman, sobrang ang lamig ng feeling ko. so there, i need something to give me warmth. ayos. :) idagdag pa ang hugs and kisses of my biatches. :) thanks friends. :p grabe, problema ko tlaga yung cl ko.nalulugmok na ko. haha. mantakin mong yun pa yung subject na nakakapagpabagabag sa aking isipan. yan ang sinasabi ko, pag pinagbabasa ng noli...napapatagalog ng makaluma. yun yun ehhhh. sana lng tlga. haaaay. oh well, i can get over this. go meeee! kaya ko to. next time tlga, mag aaral na tlga ko. as in aral. hndi aral na buklat tpos sara agad. yung aral na as in nahihilo ka na. haha. :) ganyan pala yun ha, cge cge.

so ayun yun. bukas, intrams na namin..so medyo maluwag ang schedule ng mga tao. ay, onga pla...thanks to trixie for lending me the jacket. love you bangs. mwah! :)

tpos tpos, dito ko na rin sasabihin yung mga gusto kong sabihin sa mga tao.
syempre, una si ronabel marquez na mas kilala sa tawag na beloi.
beloi: thanks sa seat. haha :) love you
hannah: thanks sa pepsi. mahahawaan na kita. :) love you.
april: magbasa-basa ka nga ng noli! puro biik sagot mo.umayos. love you biatch
trixie: i like to dance this life with you. haha. ahhhh! mwah bangs love you

so cge, that's all for today. *bow*

2006-12-11T01:00:00.000-08:00

oha oha oha! pumasok pa rin ako kahit hindi maganda ang pakiramdam ko.bait dba?san ka pa? :) so today, wala namang masyadong nangyari, i just heard about a news..and i can firmly say..na that news sucks!aba naman..ibababalik daw yung pagtake ng mga 4th yr students ng exams para matest if they're really ready to go on with college life.eh hello,mukhang napagdaanan na rin ata ng panahon yan, pero ngayon lang ibinalik ulit?isn't that..uh...unreasonable, i guess?kasi naman naman naman eh. :) oh well,kaya niyo yan geysh!so that means,putting into consideration that we are in junior yr, and we're going to be the next seniors nxt yr, we'll go through the same obstacle before we can finally say that whoa, we're done with high school, or must i say...we're ready to unfold a new chapter in our lives?oh well, maybe there's a good reason behind this, so pls..i need you guys to explain that "GOOD" reason of yours. come come come, explain, and we'll give you your worst nightmare. haha. warfreak. basta, kahit anong mangyari, 4th yr schoolmates, i know na kaya niyo yan!taga-holy kayo,and i know you can do it, no sweat pa nga eh. :) haha.

so ayun. kaninang PE, i was FORCED to play volleyball again. wag na kayong magtaka kung bakit hindi ako makaserve, well guys, i really suck in volleyball. basketball na lang pare guys. :) haha. and, and. softball, pwede rin. haha. as of this morning,i can feel that i am recovering na. oha. medyo okay na ko ngayon, and i can already move as if nothing really happened nung saturday night.haha.so so so. what can i say?mukhang bumabalik na naman ako sa makulit na nadine ha. oh well, that goes along with the term MOVING ON. haha.

as of now,maganda ang aking feeling. :) it's like..i'm a kid again..like,don't have to worry about the future, like..i don't need to think about complicated things in life...like, i don't need to get stressed out, or must i say, i don't need to feel any pain.ayun yun eh. walang pain. HAHA. how i wish wala talaga. but oh well, it's fun fun fun to worry about the future, to think about complicated things, to get stressed out, or must i say...IT'S FUN TO FEEL THE PAIN..take your fair share of the world's pain, guys.. :) i took mine..i and i've gone through every step of it...and i now i can say that i'm ready to face another one. GO ME!!!

wow. i'm a grown-up now. haha. :) iba na sinasabi ko..nawawala na sa dapat sabihin. haha. :) sige sige. :)

---remembering...when it's gone. :)---

2006-12-10T00:52:00.000-08:00

so this post is really dedicated to someone.yeah,friends...you know who the person is.i know,kung sino ka man..ikaw ang unang papasok sa utak ng mga tao pag nabasa nila to.yes, i told them that i'm over you.hindi mo nga nalaman na i even felt something for you, and now i want you to know na that feeling is over.so so over.you can say na i'm too fast to let the feeling go.but i understand the fact that believing something like this, is kind of hard to reach..and i don't really want to hurt myself from doing that. :) don't worry..i'm okay.so so okay.syempre sa una hindi, pero habang tumatagal..nakakasawa rin kasing makaramdam ng isang bagay na you aren't even sure of it.yes, yes, yes...i wasn't even sure of it.but somehow...i guess,lessons learned.in a hard way?maybe not.in a complicated way?better term i guess.we belong to different worlds :)

it lasted for how long???uhmm..matagal din siguro.haha.basta, okay na ko sa ganito.buti na lang i didn't love you.kung hindi..kung hindi....tsssss. mas mahirap yon.haha.friends,i know that this is a mix of good and bad news..pero pero pero..ganun tlaga. haha. :) sabi nga ni patty,i just have to wait for the right one. someone whom we deserve, and someone who deserves us.maybe it won't be tomorrow,or the day after tomorrow,or even the day after the day of tomorrow..but we'll wait. :)

so friends,learn from me. haha. :)

2006-12-09T18:56:00.000-08:00

so yesterday, na meet ko ang man of my dreams. haha. o kung hndi man of my dreams, siguro i want my man of my dreams to be like him. dr. sean trillanes is hot hot hot. haha! for now, yan lang muna, medyo nanghihina pa ko. need to take some rest. haha. i could have asked for his number. yuck...haha!

HAAAAPPPPPYYYYYYYY

2006-12-08T18:22:00.000-08:00

i can finally say that i have finally moved on from all the things that went on. bago diba? from all my recent posts, wala akong ginawa kung hndi hilingin na i want to move on. at last, the waiting is over. finally, i have moved on.buti na lng,i saved myself from "transforming" into someone na hndi ako.natauhan ako in other words.tsaka,i deserve to be happy and i know in my heart na dapat akong maging masaya because i've been doing great.ever since my "doomsmonth", which was the month of november,problems have been invading my mind.pati yung hndi problema, naging problema.i can't say na wala akong regrets, since hello..one month yung sinayang ko sa buhay ko to have fun..i mean..i was having fun, i went on with my life, i dealt with things, i handled what are supposed to be handled,i acted normal,i believed in myself like i used to..but the emptiness..oh yeah, that's the right term. lecheng emptiness.even if people see me laughing all the time,they can't see what's beyond that.hndi nila nakikita that i'm actually not okay..trying to be one, i guess..and i have succeeded na ipakita sa kanila na masaya ako kahit hndi.and now,i don't need to wear a mask to let them see what they have to see.friends,okay na okay na ko.goodbye doomsmonth! :) past is past. i'll leave you behind. i'll leave all the bad memories behind. thanks for teaching me how to be wise.

haha.nakakasira ng pag aaral pag iniisip ang hindi dpat isipin.ang nakakatawa lang talaga,i actually prayed for an INSPIRATION..aba, ang dumating..distraction.okay lang yun, rhyming words naman eh.at least at least.basta,dahil sa doomsmonth na yan, nakilala ko ang mga taong dapat kong makilala.ganun kabilis, ganun kaaga.ganun kawirdo, ganun kawalang-kwenta,at ganun kawalang-silbi ang ibang mga pangyayari.pero sa lahat lahat ng yan,masaya ko kasi mukhang magiging masaya ako sa mga susunod na kabanata.magiging plastic ako kung hndi ko rin sasabihin na nasaktan ako sa ibang mga nangyari, pero ganun tlaga.i won't learn kung hndi ako nasaktan.cguro,God was just testing me.to have a little share of the world's pain, i guess.i'm glad i had my fair share..and to tell you honestly,masarap din palang magkaroon ng sunud-sunod na problema.nakikita mo kasi yung silbi mo sa mundo.nakikita mo kng anong dpat baguhin,kung anong dpat palitan,kng anong dpat kalimutan.parang,nakita ko kung bakit ko kelangan pagdaanan lahat yan.i know, the pain was something that was hard to forget about, but at least..things are serving their purpose.at, at..i never asked God why these things happened..as in never.because i know,may mali din ako.sabi nga ni zyera,"bakit ka magugulat or magtataka, eh ginawa mo yan eh". eh yun.and now i am starting to feel this piece of heaven in my life.cliche as it may sound to you guys, pero tlagang pag nasaktan ka,kelangan mo lang mag move on.that's just how things work.that's the way of life.tanggapin ang dapat tanggapin, sundin ang dapat sundin.

dahil dyan, i was struck by what ate ilare sent me.it was a txt message..sapul ako dun, mehn.i sent her joke kse,and then when i pressed on the key of my phone to read her reply,aba..ang reply nya..patama. haha.hindi sya tumawa sa jokes na sinend ko..nagsend ng malupit na txt message na konti na lng, sasabog na ata yung puso ko. haha. grabe ba?nakalagay dun parang, we don't have to wake up on mornings with regrets..love the people who treat you right..FORGET ABOUT THE ONES WHO DON'T..and believe that everything happens for a reason.grabe,as i was moving on to every word, parang that message was from God.ay grabe tlaga.parang may mga anghel sa tabi tabi na ayaw magpakita.haaay.ibang level to ha.oh well. oh well. basta..kalimutan ang dpat kalimutan. :) i don't have to reminisce the past..because i might feel the pain again. haha. okay na ko..and i hope things will stay this way.

+i'll take my chances. if they can change my life, i'll let it.+

+i'll go beyond my horizons, and i'm going to let the world know that i also deserve to be happy+

2006-12-08T01:41:00.000-08:00

just had a heart to heart talk with my friend zyera. seryoso yung pag uusap namin sa ym, since we don't have much time in school to talk about our lives, and how things have been turning.ngayon na lng kme nag usap ng ganito ka seryoso ever since we entered junior year.ayun, nag usap kme about things, and i highlighted the things that are meant to be said.as usual, madrama kme.iba ka tlga zyera. :) i miss you so so so much.:)sabi ko rin sa kanya that i've been doing good,because that's the truth.grabe. :) love you zyera!i miss second yr!

nga pala, nagkalagnat ako kagabi. 39. oha. :)

2006-12-01T15:04:00.000-08:00

wala pa kong pahingang matino! grabe. pano ba naman kasi, ang ingay ng mga tao dito. haha. kasi nandito lolo and lola ko,so yun..kaya super ingay. pero masaya naman. :) parang wala akong problema. nakakalimutan ko. :) kagabi, we also had the chance to spend time with some of our cousins since birthday ng tita namin. :) eh yun.parang, december 1..so it's kind of brand new start. haha. di ko rin masyado favorite yun ha. :P so yeah, kahapon din..nagpagupit ako..my hair's short na, thanks to miss jiejie of david's. nagmukha nga lang akong bata sa buhok ko, pero okay na yun. :) masaya na rin ako ngayon kasi alam kong dapat akong maging masaya. magulo ba? haha. :)

look to this day for it is life :) oha. ---kalidasa's salutation to the dawn. :)

2006-11-30T02:37:00.000-08:00

this day has been a hard day for me. well, one of the hardest, i guess. but still, it's HARD. i've been very sensitive since then..since that freakin' day happened. and i totally hate the feeling of having regrets. kahit naman kasing anong sabihin, may mali din ako. and yeah, i can say that i've been the stupid type. oh well, kaya ko to. tomorrow will be a brand new start. life must go on and on and on. so, ladies and gentlemen, make way. :) i'm gonna be the best person that i can be starting tonight. :) and yeah, i'm starting to learn..OHA.

looosaaahhh. :p

"hear my heart out. :)"
+++lossaaahhh,get a life.+++

2006-11-29T01:50:00.000-08:00

so today will be the start of a 4-day weekend since we heard on the radio that classes will be suspended because of the typhoon. buti naman. haha. and daming quizzes bukas and i don't know how will i start studying. tapos ayun, i finally got the news na wala ngang pasok. so yun, that made my heart happy for the first time this week. ay mali pala, second pala since bati na kami ng bestfriend kong si hannah. we finally talked kanina and tried to patch things up. buti naman. yung third thing that made me happy was that my mom told me that my lolo and lola will be coming over for a vacation. kaya yun, YEHAY. :) haha. kaninang chem period, hndi na naman ako nakikinig. haha. tapos, i messed up with trigo quiz. haha. my mind was not set on that quiz eh. i was thinking about how will i settle things with people. and dami kong inaaway kasi i'm so sensitive these days. haha. isang tao lang naman ang dapat sisihin sa lahat. haha. sino? AKO. :) if i did not allow things to happen, eh hindi talaga mangyayari. but i still let things happen, tapos sa huli magsisi din pala ako. talk about being stupid once in a while. basta, i won't make the same mistakes again. never ever again. i'm craving for pineapple juice, and i really don't know why. haha. ang labo ko tlaga.

grabe, i think i'm starting to change for a better cause. naka. haha. :) basta, i'll just let things flow, deal with it, and then move on. :) kaya ko to. kaninang chem, i wrote a poem for trixie.. the title was "why did you have to"..i'll post it here pag nabalik na nya yung copy sken. :)

2006-11-28T01:58:00.000-08:00

so today, sobrang daming nangyari na mahirap i explain. first, bumalik na ata ako sa dating tamad na Nadine. grabe naman. alam ko na ngang may long test sa ap, hindi pa rin ako nag aral. magaling talaga ako. buti na lang, pumasa pa rin ako kahit wala akong matandaan. haha. tapos kanina pang music period, umiral na naman ang pagiging sensitive ko sa mga bagay. nagalit ako bigla kahit hindi ko alam yung totoong rason. minsan talaga, ang tanga ko rin eh. eh yun. at least may natutunan ako dun. muntik na naman akong maiyak kanina kasi sobrang problemado ako. marami ng nangyari, and i didn't want to let this thing add up to my concerns. my life is really complicated these days, and i'm trying to understand and let things sink in before i let myself do something about them. oh well, i know i still have to learn a lot of things about life, but at this age, i know na i've learned a lot already. sabi sa inyo eh, nothing will ever beat the learnings the you can get from your and others' mistakes. sabi ko nga, i have to learn from others' as well since i can't have a long life to learn everything. so yun. likewise, alam ko rin na natututo sila sakin. right guys? right. :) basta, masaya na ko ngayon kasi people are making ways to make me feel better. minsan talaga, you have to experience hardships para makita mo kung sino yung mga dadamay sayo in times of sadness and pain. no doubt, my biatches are right behind my back. :) superrrrrrr dupperrrrr. :)

ap hw! :)

+ never try to praise everyone because this might let you forget the real YOU +

+ trixie said i don't deserve any of it. i believe her. :) +

+ for as long as i have you, i would have reasons to be happy--thanks for giving me the groove of my life+

2006-11-27T01:29:00.000-08:00

the moment I reached school this morning, i went straight to my locker, got my books and went upstairs. this day was definitely NOT a good day for me. not that i want to die or something, but it's just that i'm kind of stressed about everything. first, there's something wrong about me. i can feel that. and i hate that feeling. grabe lang tlaga yung mga nalaman ngayong araw na to. but i won't tell all the details because i also want to keep something for myself. and yeah, i also want to protect the name of the person involved. i'm not that kind of person naman na just because something happened, gaganti ako. eh yun. at least, i know na i can move on. right tricia? RIGHT. so so right. sabi nga nila sken, everything happens for a reason. let's just say i'm still waiting for that reason :) mukhang matagal akong maghihintay, but i know na pag nalaman ko yun, it would make the waiting worthwhile. basta, i'll leave everything to God. :) hndi ko na lng tlga nakayanan kanina that was why i had to vent it out. i cried, and that made me feel better.kahit na masama tong araw na to, i tried to go on with the day as if nothing happened. and i have found reasons naman why i shouldn't give up..that makes it much easier this time. :) wala naman akong problema when it comes to dealing with things like this, kaya lang nagkasabay-sabay yung problema, and i got confused. sometimes, kelangan ko ring umiyak to blurt everything out. grabe, believe me....it HELPED! so yun, nag-plan kmeng lumabas sa thursday after school since wala namang pasok sa friday.excited na nga ako kse medyo kelangan ko ng time with my friends. i mean, lagi ko silang kasama, pero iba yung labas na just for fun. :)

kahit na may mga bagay na nangyari, alam kong above all these, God has a surprise for me. :) i'm looking at things at the brighter side. :) alam kong kaya ko to. i can feel the heat. :) so hear my heart out. :)

+God only gives happy endings..when you think that you're not happy in the end...maybe it's not yet the end.+

I CAN MAKE THINGS HAPPEN. :) FATE AND DESTINY...two things that i firmly believe. :)

2006-11-26T00:54:00.000-08:00

i'm talking to tricia, at gusto naming maglaho. as in MAGLAHO bigla. haha.

2006-11-24T04:50:00.000-08:00

Oha! bawal ang mashing gun sa school. Bawal yan. BAWAL.

2006-11-23T02:22:00.000-08:00

grabe tong araw na to. wala ako sa tamang pag iisip.grabe. natulog lng ako sa ibang class. kanina lng sobrang antok na antok ako.so ngayon, inaantok ako at parang ayoko ng ituloy yung post na to. okay, so..matutulog na lng ako. :) labo.

+ love is being stupid together. Oha. +

2006-11-18T17:11:00.000-08:00

~i'm craving for vanilla ice cream.
~i want to go out.
~swimming!
~badminton with my friends!
~money!
~refill ng pilot ko.
~yung labas namin sa saturday..kung pupunta ba tlaga ako, or feeling ko lang na pumunta ngayon kaya gusto ko? ewan.
~bread pan.
~yung shirt ni trixie.
~bagong calcu. wala na trixie, tapon na natin yung calcu natin. haha.
~gusto kong maging chemist.-->asa.
~tumawa ng tumawa ng tumawa.
~bagong file case! haha. yung clear! :)
~namimiss ko si cza. :)
~gusto ko tlagang matawa.
~gusto ko ng mag intrams.
~xmas. :)
~bday ko.
~divi? haha. wala lang, naisip ko lang.
~ano kaya kung tanggalin ko na tong blog ko?
~play games. YUH, games.
~kape. oo, kape. :)
~gusto kong magpunta sa bahay nila hannah. :)
~matatawa ba ko, o maiiyak?
~i want to shout!
~beach.

2006-11-18T16:32:00.000-08:00

grabe, sino ba kse si d' estes. mga 2 weeks ko na rin siyang hinahanap. hw ko siya sa ap. arrgh! nov 24 ko na ipapasa yan, pero wala pa kong nahahanap sa kanya. cute kaya siya? haha. :) grabe naman kse eh. ang hirap. wala naman akong choice kundi hanapin, or else..wala akong hw. haaay. pero, sang lupalop naman ng mundong earth ko hahanapin si cutie d' estes. buti sana kung hndi ap subject to eh..haller.ang hirap. d bale na nga. sana lang tlaga, may mabait na taong tutulong sken sa paghahanap sa kanya. aba naman kse, medyo nawawalan na ko ng brain cells at medyo nabubulag na ko kakahanap sa kanya.eh kung sa encyclopedia kaya?ayoko, tamad akong maghanap pag dun. haha. mas maganda sa internet. haha. para makita ko kng cute ba sya, o hot, o mixture nung dalawa, or medyo lang. ayun. haha. tama ba namang pati siya. haha. :) grabe, ngayon na lang ulit ako gumawa ng hw pag weekend. parang mga 2 months ko ring iniwan yung pagiging responsible ko. dakilang crammer nga ako diba. hallloowww.

anyway, sana lang talaga, maging masaya na ulit ako. medyo nakakalungkot lang kse yung mga nangyari. parang, papatawanin ako ng mga friends ko, and then malulungkot din ako pagkatapos. you can't blame me for being like this these past few days. pero i think i can still manage to go on with this week. sana lang, next week, maging okay na rin ako. ayoko na nung senti senti eh. nakakainis yung ganun. d pa naman ako sanay na malungkot. mamamatay ako pag hndi ako tumawa. :) gravaaalllloooo. :)

--i want to tell the world that i also deserve to be happy.--
--hey world, i deserve to be happy. promise, i do.--

walang makakapilit sken. haha. LOSHERSS.

2006-11-18T05:28:00.000-08:00

so today, binigay yung card namin. i woke up at around 6 am since i still have to do some other things. my grades were not that bad. but still bad. haha. enough for the bad news, good news naman. after nung kuhanan ng cards, pinaalam ako ni tricia sa mama ko if i could with them sa sophs. my mom said yes. eh yun. i didn't know na si tricia pa yung magpapaalam for me. o ha. haha. :) after that, nagkaron kme ng mga biglaang plans. ayun, nag mcdo kme after school.nilibre kme ni tricia ng ice cream. haha. tpos, hinatid nila ko, and then i went home by myself. thanks guys. i was with trixie, patbu, kae, espi.. ayun. we were fooling around the whole time. eh yun. pagkatapos, nanood ako ng dvd. butterfly effect. ganda. :p

haaaay. grabe, pagod ako. :P

---having trust doesn't mean you need to know everything. trust is knowing a little, but believing too much. :)---

* trixie was the star. she was wearing a green shirt na maraming kapareho. o ha? SIKAT. haha.

love you tiks!

2006-11-17T01:46:00.000-08:00

a lot of things have happened for the past few weeks or days that i didn't post. some things are better left unsaid, better left untyped, or better left posted here. whatever term that is, BAD TRIP AKO SA MGA NANGYARI.to make the feeling even worse, idagdag pa ang sakit ng ulo ko kanina. i don't know how to express the feelings that are meant to be expressed. ewan ko tlga. sa lahat ng mga nangyayari, mangyayari, o nangyari...EWAN KO NA TALAGA. i do hope that batman exists. i need batman. bahala na siya sa lahat. :( alam ko, naging masama ako sa mga nagawa ko. but i think, that was the only way to make things easier for all of us. sakripisyo. :) at least, i went on with the day just fine, and i think i performed pretty well in school. kahit hndi ako masyadong nakatulog ng maayos kagabi because of stuffs, okay pa rin. ako pa? haha.

anyway, walang bagong nangyari. grabe, ang bilis lang talaga ng mga pangyayari. i never expected that things could happen in a very, very..i mean very...very FAST way.

what did i gain from all these? one word : CONFUSION.

---you can't say that something is sweet when you've never tasted something bitter.---
-----pls, love me in the morning----- :)

2006-11-11T04:51:00.000-08:00

we had our class parteeyyy! that's all. :)

2006-11-03T20:44:00.001-08:00

I just got home from ilocos. Grabe, super nakapag-rest ako ng malupitan dun. Lahat ng gusto kong kainin, nakakain ko dun. Haha. Spoiled sa lolo’t lola eh. Haha. Tumaba nga ako eh. Kasi naman eh, sobrang kain tulog, buhay batugan. Haha. Hindi natuloy yung practice naming ngayon, kasi naurong din daw kasi nga kasabay ba naman dapat ng interaction. Haller. Haha. Eh ayun, masaya naman ako at hndi natuloy kasi super antok ako no. ikaw kaya magbyahe. Haller. Eh ayun. At least lang tlga, nakapag-rest ako ng malupitan this sembreak kasi pagbalik ko next wk, grabe na naman ang stress. Haaaay. Tpos ayun, gusto ko nga matulog ulit kaya lng andami ko pang gngwa. Ang lupit nung chem., grabe..nababagabag parin ako dun up to now. Haaay. Pero cge, laban lng ng laban. Kaya ko to. Haha. Tanggap ko na na halos lahat ng grades ko, baba na. haha. Say mo? Haha . tssss.

“ there’s this guy, and he kinda has my heart “----april.
“ napakagaling. Umaarangkada. “----kagitingan

from now on, ako na si WENDY. from neverland. beh! haha. :p

2006-10-30T19:09:00.000-08:00

So yeah, I am home alone with kuya since mama had to go out to pay our bills. I was supposed to go with her but then I felt sleepy all of a sudden and so just right after I took breakfast, I went upstairs again to go back to sleep, pero hndi ko makuha yung tulog ko so I just grabbed any book that I could read, and I am currently reading To Kill a Mocking Bird. Yeah, the one that Jamie Sullivan’s reading. Haha. Eh yun. Heading to Ilocos later with mom, kuya and my fave aunt. Excited? Obvious? Haha

100 Things I’ve been thinking since last night:

the beach
vanilla ice cream
new haircut
my failing grades
breadpan. Sh*t, breadpan
that song. Yeah, the song. SH*T haha.
haha. Yung message ni april
call from a stranger
yung nag tag na hndi ko kilala up to now.
isang taong mahal ko. Sh*t, magonline ka na! haha. You know who you are, b*tch! Haha.
Saturday classes! Argh! How I hate the news!
wondering if I would write someone a letter
the line “thanks for taking care of my heart” shit, ano ba yan! Haha.
wondering if my parents would allow me to go somewhere else.
HANNAH
mcdo!
caramel sundae
movie marathon
new shoes!
new layout
to cut my nails short, or to let it grow longer? Argh!
HIM. Haha. Cno? Haha. Si kuya. LOL.
iniisip ko pa yung 77 thoughts na iniisip ko since last night haha.

2006-10-30T03:24:00.000-08:00

Grabe tong araw na to. Sobrang I literally slept the whole day. I woke up at around 8, just to take my breakfast, then went up to my room and got back to bed. That was around 9, I guess. And then my mom knocked on my door that was why I was forced to wake up, then I looked at my clock, and then I said, “shit, 12 na pla. Haha. I took lunch with my mom, and then my kuya. Haha. Grabe ang takaw ko nga. Haha. Nag-aalala nga yung mama ko sken kse daw baka maging mataba ako. Haha. Sabi ko naman “mama naman, nagbabawi lng ako. Haha. eh ayun. Grabe, ang sarap magpakabatugan. haha.

Off to Ilocos tomorrow. Excited.

2006-10-23T02:08:00.000-07:00

today is the start of our exam week. eh wala namang pasok bukas, kaya napag isipan kong mag check ng mail, ng ym, ng everything. :) sobrang sakit ng ulo namin, pano ba naman kse, halos every period may quiz. asa pa ko dba? entrep and ap went fine. yun nga lng, sa ap nahirapan ako sa isang part. pero okay lng yan. :) sobrang we were rushing everything. aba naman, pati noli, ni-rush namin. weird but true. we lack time, you know. when i say we lack time, we LACK time. as in, as in, as in. :) the moment i got to school nga kaninang umaga, everyone was passing some stress germs. wala akong magawa, and so I just let things be that way. nagpasahan na nga stress. sobrang dmeng requirements. as in, dami.

but you know, things have fallen into place. kaninang bago kme umuwi, we ate some saba con yelo. i was with hannah, cza, and beloi. ayun, we planned to go out on a gimmick tom...using my yacht. :) yeah, yacht. haha. asa. grabe, pagksama ko sila, nawawala lahat ng problema ko...ang kulit namin kanina. :)

second qtr tlga super hirap. as in. ang sakit sa puso. haha. :)

bsta, kaya yan. dba? :)

--every person will have 15 mins of fame. -- andy warhole.

*waiting for mine to come!*

2006-10-14T21:55:00.001-07:00

today's sunday so the first thing i did was to go to mass with my parents since kuya is having his retreat. this weekend is so tiring. i had to work on 3 projects. one after the other, leaving sleepless nights for myself. oh well, to add up to that, it's hard to deal with ghosts in your mind, you know. oh come on, of course, i'm still afraid of ghosts. :) then again, Chem is getting harder. you know, the balancing and stuffs, and the kinds of reactions. plus, there's the periodic table to memorize. i know that it's really easy for some who are so smart, and that's the problem with me..i am not as smart as they are. kaya sana lang, don't brag right in front of me because it's not proper. :) pero okay lang, since may ipagyayabang ka. kaya lang kse, buti kung ako lng yung nayayabanagan diba. enough is enough, so pls, know when to stop. :)

my mom is worrying about me so much. yesterday, i had tests, and my mom needed to get blood from me. oh yeah, injection, my dear. and because she wanted to know what's wrong with me(since she noticed that i'm getting sick almost every week), i agreed to have some tests taken. the result was fine. yeahbah! wala akong sakit. repeat, wala akong sakit.pero yun nga, may ubo pa rin ako. so what i told her is that maybe it's because of too much stress or something. eh yun. after all, she can't blame me for that. it's hard to study, you know. :)

and now, just because i want to forget about my complicated life, i'm blogging right now. come on, sobrang ang pangit tlaga ng feeling. it's like, there's problem here, and then you find ways to solve it, and then another problem comes along, and then you find ways to solve it again, and then another again. haaay. nakakapagod din. :( but it's okay. at least, kakayanin ko to. :)

*don't act as if we're close. oh pls. :)*

2006-10-13T04:04:00.000-07:00

actually, this week was a blur. grabe, a lot of things happened. mostly, hndi maganda. pero at least, for a week, i have realized more that i am not a quitter. grabe. natamaan ako dun sa sinabi ni ms platon kahapon na "things happen for a reason. but sometimes, you have to wait for a long time to know the reason behind it. when you get the chance to know the reason, it makes the waiting all worth it." grabe, sometimes i do not know what to do. troubled with problems, pressure, stress, complicated life, mistakes----these are the things that make my life hard. as in, sometimes, i don't know if i could still hold on. ang sarap sumigaw sa field.

grabe ang chem. actually, i'm really having a hard time dealing with the subject this time. second qtr has given me a lot of frustrations. anyway, i won't quit. fighter to. lol. kanina, sobrang inantok ako. it was a very tiring day for me kahit wala kme masyadong ginawa. eh pano ba naman kse, hndi ako nakakakuha ng at least 7 hrs of sleep everyday. tao rin naman ako dba, napapagod. at least this weekend. bawi. :P

last saturday pla yung soiree nmen. everything went fine. okay lng lahat. ayun. nag enjoy naman kme. at least natapos nmen yung investy before nun, and so we had fun. :p

ang dme nga namang chuchu sa mundo. distractions come at hand. hello, sana lng distansya. pero i can't tell right in front him/her na naiinis ako sa nangyayari. kse naman, dadagdag pa yun sa mga concerns ko. :p anyway, kaya ko to.

HEY PROBLEM, I HAVE A BIG GOD. P

sana naman magaling na ko sa monday. may sakit pa rin ako up to now. sana lng tlga. friends, you are my reasons why i'm trying to hold on. :)

+ i love you like i love vanilla ice cream +

----sing for me and my heart will sing for you. ***grow old with YOU***

2006-10-02T01:39:00.000-07:00

the weird things about this day are the weirdest things I've ever encountered in my 15 yrs of existence. yesterday, I had this feeling of excitement because I'm going to school already the following day. And because I was kind of school sick, I prayed for a fair weather. And, there..I fortunately reached school safe. But a lot of weird things happened even before I entered my school bus. My "tsupon" (term ni Kaye) jug broke, and the water in it obviously got spilled. The funny thing about this was, there was this grade school busmate of mine who happened to step on the water, and she said obviously taken by surprise.."binagyo pati yung loob ng bus?". I can't help laughing. As in. I wanted to read my book, Smart Women by Judy Blume, but I was going to have my quiz in Chem. So there I was, sitting on my place, waiting for the next who's going to be fetched, reading my notes, understanding...killing myself softly.

The moment I reached my classroom, everyone was quiet. Malamang, may quiz sa Chem..so kinarir na nmen tlaga. We had flag cem, and so we had to go down. I stayed at the back of the line.. then another weird thing took place. Nagkwento si Cel about her dream. Ang weird. May boyfriend daw siyang English, who looks like Korina. And, hello...si Nads biglang naalala yung something about dun. Basta. HAHA. Chem quiz went fine naman. We learned balancing. :)

And ayun, nag recess kme. Hindi na nga ako bumaba since I was busy doing my stuffs. Anong stuffs? Anna, pakisagot nga. haha. Basta, alam na ng iba yun. Grabe. I'm gonna miss my seatmates. You guys rocked my 2nd qtr! Ang saya. I wonder if my next seatmates would spare time for some games like "ang ni ay ni". Haaay. I'm gonna MYSM, guys. :)

At ano naman feeling ng mawalan ng phone kahit wala ka namang kasalanan? Syempre, that sucks. Pero okay lang. Haha. Guys, I'll buy globe para mas madali geys.

Kanina nag quiz kme sa AP, and I messed up.. haha. sobrang naiinis ako dun sa quiz na yun. I thought I'm gonna fail. Fortunately, okay naman yung score ko. haha.

yun lng nangyari this day. :)

*there's more to life than cheating*...----> Smart Women.
*you can use what God gave you to reach for your dreams, but make sure you're not hurting someone else along the way*

2006-09-16T18:54:00.000-07:00

kahapon, we went to school for our music practice. nagkasabay kse yung sa meet the experts tsaka yung sa music kaya nahati yung time nmen. kaya rin maraming problem dahil dun. haaay nako. ewan. bday ni hannah kahapon kaya pumunta kme sa mcdo after school and then i bought things from expressions kse kelangan ko tlga. eh ayun. umuwi rin kme kaagad kse sabi ko kay hannah ang sakit ng ulo ko. so there. si april pla yung transpo nmen papunta sa mcdo. grabe. masaya sana yung kahapon kaya lng nakagat ko yung dila ko ng super duper sakit. ang sakit tlga. up to now. imagine that. problemado pren ako ngayon kse kulang pa yung sa meet the experts. haaay. tpos wala pang dry ice. wow dba. parang hello, san nman ako maghahanap nun. may practice pa bukas sa music. until 5. problema ko pa ngayon kung payagan ako ng mama ko kse medyo late na rin ako umuwi kahapon. pero cge, magagawan ng paraan yan. haaay nako naman.

retreat na rin nmen sa saturday. problema ko rin kung sasama ako sa 25. may gimmick daw eh. kaya lng, may pasok na the following day. sakitin pa man din ako. haaay. pagod yun. pero cge, magdedesisyon na ko. sana payagan ako. marami rin akong problema sa school. i think this qtr won't make me happy. my grades are falling down. haha.mala london bridge. hay nako. as if naman kse madali and third yr. hallooo! pero kakayanin nten to geyssss. may problema din pla ako sa friends. ang dme no? haha. pero magso-sorry ako. kaya ko to. sorry tlga, kasalanan ko kse eh. sorry.

sa mga na joke about dun sa story ko, sorry din. haha. joke lng geys. magbabago na tlga ko. sana lng, hndi ko mamiss yung dating ako. mahirap kseng magbago kung napipilitan ka lng. pero kelangan, kse para rin saken to. mahirap man, kelangan tanggapin. ganun tlga. anyway, masasanay din ako. sana lng, hndi ako mahirapan ng sobra sobra. alam ko namang kseng okay na ko kung sino man ako ngayon, pero hindi lng sarili ko yung dapat i-put into consideration. kaya nga, i'll try my very best. kahit ikamatay ko pa. :) kala lng kse ng iba, puro pagpapatawa lng ako, pero sana inaalam niyo rin kung bakit ako ganun. isa lng nman, marami kse akong problema na hindi ako mailabas. yun tlga yung rason. so sana, wag rin lng yung sarili niyo yung i-put into consideration. sana rin ma-realixe kahit minsan na nagta-try ako. that's all that matters. pag ang tao nagta-try, somehow, nakikisama siya ng maayos. so yun. mahirap sa inyo, oo alam ko. pero ako rin nahihirapan. lalo na yung isang tao na yun. akala ko pa nman maiintindihan mo ko..pero mali pla. ako pla dpat yung umintindi, kse mas malaki yung problema mo. sana lng kse, pareho tayong mag-try. sana lng.

marami akong problema, at wala dpat akong time makialam sa problema ng iba. pero in some cases, kelangan ko tlgang makialam kse importante yung taong yun sken. sana lng, ma-appreciate din nya yung kahit konti.

scream nadine. scream.

+ mahirap, pero dapat. +

2006-09-15T02:39:00.000-07:00

ang saya ng araw na to.

first, kse walang geom. nag answer lng kme ng sw kse wala si mrs dino. second, we don't have chem pag friday. third, bday ni hannah bukas kaya excited ako. fourth, kse friday ngayon. fifth, ang saya ng session nmen knina sa english. thanks to our teacher, ms platon for preparing something really cool for the batch. miss platon, you are indeed a very good teacher. :)

ngayon ko lng rin na realize na masaya din pla tlga ang third yr. stress is on but i have learned to face life head-on. sabi nga sa poem ni binasa ni miss platon knina....DON'T quit. and just now, i have encountered this saying..."it's better to be a has been than a might have been because a might have been has never been a has been, but a has been took place." yan, para sken tlga yang saying eh. kse i tend to live life without any risk at all. eh boring ang buhay if it's riskless. kung mag-fail man, at least nag-try kesa naman iispin mo in the future na "what if?". dba dba.

ang saya nung pagputok ng balloon kanina. na feel ko ng todo. mahal ko na tlga ang buhay ko. honestly, i could say that i'm in the process of realizing the things i have missed in the past, but im also in the process of learning how to take the risk of this life. minsan lng kse ako mabuhay, eh wny not make the most out of everything. :) marami rin plang nagmamahal sken. and sobrang swerte ko kse may kuya ako na super baet. kahit nag aaway kme minsan, he's still the best kuya in the world. grabe, idol kita kuya. i love you. he's my teacher kse, and a best friend na rin. haaaay.

ngayon, masaya ako kse mas nakita that i can do something about my fears. kaya ko silang kalimutan kse they're holding me back. kaya ko lahat kse alam kong may mga taong nandyan para sken no matter what.

salamat sa lahat kagitingan for giving me the reason to be strong. you know, ayoko sa section nten dati but i have felt love for our section. salamat sa lahat. kagits: kaya nten to. kaya nten to. :)

*the only risk is the risk of riskless living. there's nothing wrong with reaching out for the stars, because no matter what happens, God will catch you*

2006-09-13T04:39:00.000-07:00

kung kelan kita kelangan, dun ka pa lumalayo sa kin..

can't you see that i'm hurting. malamang, hindi. nagtaka pa ko. manhid ka pala kaya hinding-hindi mo makikita na nahihirapan din ako. yun na nga yung mahirap dun. manhid na nga, bulag pa. pero mas kawawa ako..ako yung naiipit sa sitwasyon. maybe i just have to deal with this.....alone. yeah, without you. it's not my loss after all. kaya ko kahit wala ka, kahit wala ka forever. i mean hello, nakayanan ko nun mag-isa kahit nawalan ako ng set of friends.. meaning, hindi lang isa. eh ikaw, isa ka lang, at hindi ikaw ang mundo ko. sana minsan, maging sensitive ka rin kasi hindi lng ikaw yung tao sa mundo. wag kng manhid. sana lang.

so kanina, sa totoo lang, nahirapan ako sa araw na to. mahirap ang third yr. pero masaya ako kse ang dme kong natututunan this yr. i mean, tipong napapatulala ako tlaga. lalo na sa AP.haha. anyway, kanina sobrang dmeng quiz. i mean, madame, yung sobra pa sa sobra. ang tindi. pero nakaya ko naman eh. sabi nga ng mama ko "wag mong sabihin na hindi mo kaya kung wala ka pa sa sitwasyon". tama nga naman. sabi pa nya "life is a game, but not JUST a game". oh well, ganyan tlaga nanay ko. makata ang dating. ngayon, sobrang wala pa kong tulog. kse naman, ang sarap mag star gazing kagabi while studying. alam mo naman, pag down ang tao..kung ano ano na lng yung ginagawa. and now, i could say that i'm down. kse naman eh. i hate it. ARGH!

kagabi sobrang hindi ko na kinaya. ang weird. i was reading my hand-outs for my rizal quiz the following day, and then i suddenly felt really sad, that i did not notice that i already burst into tears. tpos the weird thing about that was that i was looking at the moon and talking to it. weird. 12 na ko natulog nun because i was trying to imagine that what if i am the moon, or something like that. ang weird tlga. pero i felt better. someitmes tlaga all you have to do is to cry when you can't hold on anymore. and i felt really better. haaaay. ang dme rin kseng problema. minsan nga iniisip ko na i'm abusing myself. yung tipong lahat na lang ng pang-iinsulto sa sarili ko ginagawa ko pag bumagsak ako sa isang bagay. oh well, you can't blame me for that. lahat ng tao ganun, minsan lng sumosobra na ko. pressured ako ng malupit kse ang dmeng problema. yung problemang hindi naman super laki pero for me malaki kse nga sabay-sabay. haaay. pero kaya ko to.. alam kong kaya ko to. ako pa. haha. :)

*there's nothing wrong with reaching for the stars, because if you fail, God will be ready to catch you*

+ my only star is you. +

2006-09-08T02:28:00.000-07:00

Since Friday ngayon, I can say that my schedule is not that hectic. Pupunta kame sa divi bukas dahil sa entrep. Half of me tells me na masama sa loob ko na pumunta, the other half tells me that I should go because I want to and I need to. O diba, lumalabas pagka manananggal ko. Medyo medyo. Kanina last outreach nmen sa boys’ town. Masaya nman kse naglaro kme nung mga bata dun. Ang saya. Nakakapagod nga lng tlaga. Pero one thing I have realized and felt was that it was all worth it. Ganun tlaga. Kanina rin ang kuhanan ng cards. Hay. Ayun. May mga umiyak and I comforted people. :) Mabait ako eh. :) Tapos kanina, my classmates and I talked some serious matters. Seryoso. Tulad. ng. home. family. and. the. such. At ayun. Ngayon ko lang nalaman na swerte na ko kung anong meron ako ngayon. Haaay. Nga pla, thanks to Trixie Segundo for making my day complete. Love you Tiks! Nag-usap kme ni Tiks kanina, seryosong talk. Haaaay. Can't imagine life without her. love you so. :) At ayan....:)

2006-09-02T00:55:00.000-07:00

I really don't know why I am feeling sadness within me. Ang weird ko nga kahapon sa bus( since we watched a play yesterday). Grabe, I am not talking to anybody at all. Magsasalita at tatawa lang ako pag may makikipag-uusap sakin. But I was never the one who opened any topic. Not so me. WEIRD. Siguro nga stress lang kasi to. Siguro nga masyado na kong pressured sa mga bagay. Ang weird tlaga. Kahapon dapat masaya ako, and I regret that I didn't have fun. It was not my day. Pero okay lang, maybe next time. *fingers crossed*. Kahapon din pala, tinawag kami ng Guidance.. hala! bakit? okay, okay, wala akong kaso and whatsoever. May invitation lang daw at kami ang napili niyang sumali. Hindi ko masyadong naintindihan yung sinasabi ni Miss kahapon kasi yung utak ko medyo, medyo lng naman, medyo wala sa orihinal nitong shape kahapon. Haaay. Eh ayun, dahil nga sa mabalahura ang araw ko kahapon, umuwi na lang ako ng maaga at niyaya ko yung isa kong friend na manood ng movie sa bahay. I had fun, pero sandali lang. Pagkatapos ng movie balik na naman ako sa pagka senti-senti kong feeling. Paano ba naman kasi, yung movie na pinanood nmen...ang walang kamatayang a walk to remember. :) Pero hindi nga, ang sagwa tlaga ng pakiramdam. Nag-brown-out pa kaya lalo tuloy akong na-depress. Haha. Tapos hindi pa tuloy yung pagpunta namin ng homeroom groupmates ko sa divisoria for entrep. Pero guys, next week. Aayusin natin lahat yung sched para hindi tayo maloka. Nga pala, late din pala ako nagising kanina kasi itong week nato, super nakakapagod. Parang hinigop lahat nag lakas ko. May nangyari pang hindi maganda nung isang araw. O diba? Pinapapakinggan mo pa lang, nakaka stress na. Pano pa kaya akong naka-experience?Medyo masarap ngang tumambling eh. Grabe tlaga. Pero kaya ko to. Pinag-iisipan ko pa kung tatanggapin ko yung invitation ni Miss Ticman. Parang gusto ko na ayaw ko. Basta, ewan ko na naman kung bakit. Kagabi nga antok na antok na ako pero yoko pang matulog. Mga 11:30 na ko natulog kaya late ako nagising. Mga 11 pala ako nagising ngayon kasi sobrang ngayong lng din ako nakakabawi ng tulog kasi nga pamatay tong linggong to. Ang tindi. Buti nga wala kami masyadong HW, at wala kmeng projects to work on. Magulo lang talaga isip ko at feeling ko bibigay yung katawan ko eventually. I don't want to expect na magkakasakit ako pero I can't help it. Haay. Ang hirap pa naman maghabol. Worst nightmare ko nung first yr na nagkasakit ako for 1 week, masaklap test days pa, masaklap, 4th qtr pa. WEIRD. haaay nako, di yun mauulit. di ako papayag. as if masasabihan ko yung sakit na ipagpaliban muna ang pagdapo niyang mapanira sa katawan ko. bahala na. sige, itutulog ko na lang ulit to. nga pala, ang funny nung book ni BOB ONG. (stainless longganisa)

2006-08-26T01:45:00.000-07:00

this day was a blast. ang saya!

bsta, updates na lng next week. pagod ako eh.haha. :)

2006-08-25T04:47:00.000-07:00

grabe tong araw na to. kapagod- pagod. well, i have so many things to do over the weekend so i guess i have to really memorize the poem invictus. sa mga hndi nakakaalam, ang invictus ay isang poem. the poem goes.."i am the captain of my soul", blah blah. sorry, hindi ko memorize. nga pla, invictus means undefeated in latin. well, poetry class eh. haha. so ayun, kanina nag practice kami and i could say that we had a great day. ang saya kanina! masaya din pla mamroblema kung pano ka uuwi kasi umuulan at gutom na gutom ka na. sobrang pati dulo ng kalamnan mo mangangatog sa gutom. haha. tapos ayun, until 6pm ata kami sa school. haha, thanks to patbu for being so patient.grabe! sorry kasi i really can't concentrate. bangag for short. and oh well, maganda na rin naman yung performance namin kanina. haha. isa pang dahilan kung bakit ako napagod ay dahil sa larong "ang ni ay ni". haha, grabe. naubos enrhiya ko dun, pare. haha. si anna, patty, at bea, mga "ang ni ay ni" mates ko yang mga yan. thanks guys for giving me the time to release the stress. haaay. so ayun, nagpractice kami habang umuulan. haha, aba'y napupuwing na nga kme dahil sa ulan eh. so natpos yung practice nmen ng mga 6. ang problema na naman ay kung paano kme uulan. tatlong choices yung naiwan eh. first, lulusob kmai sa ulan, sencond, magpapasundo kami sa bus, at third, sasabay kay kazzi. since hndi sumipot yung bus ni kazzi, dalawang choices na lng natira. eh malamang, ayaw nmen magkasakit, so isa na lang..nagpasundo kami sa bus. at yun, awa ng Diyos, nakauwi kme ng safe. sa bus, super laught trip kme. dumaan kme sa red ribbon kse super hindi nmen malaman yung pakiramdam ng nagugutom at napagod sa kakaisip. kumain kme sa bus at nagatawanan ulit. bumaba ako sa bahay nila hannah kse nga andun gamit ko. umuulan pa nga nun. tpos ayun, umuwi na ko. haaay.

so pano guys, may practice bukas...tara! haha. tulog na ko..aga pa kme bukas. :)

PS. sarap nung empanada. haha. :)

2006-08-20T20:23:00.000-07:00

i am actually having the day of my life. i got to rest really well over the weekend. and yah, i got recharged for a whole qtr's activites for the second qtr. sana lang, i would do much better this time. sabi ko nga, i was kind of culture-shoched kasi i was assuming that i could get over the first qtr in third yr better than i did when i was in second yr. pero i am proud myself na 3 beses lng akong umiyak for the whole qtr. considering that i was facing a lot of things; stress to be more specific, hindi na masama yung 3 beses na yun ha. kung sa iba yan, maybe they would experience life in mental hospital, or worse, baka they have would have a near-death exeperience because of slashing their wrist, or the worst of all, tumalong sabuilding, at yun, died. maybe i am not bad at all when i a need to face the painful awakenings of my life. anyway, i still have the stars to talk to at night when my day did not go well. and yes, i still have my friends who are ready to get bugged while they are in their wee hours of a peaceful sleep. ika nga eh, dapat lang talaga nila akong damayan. haha.

i am reading a book and it's really nice. SUMMER SISTERS by JUDY BLUME. it's really great. pano ba yan hannah, mukhang namomroblema ako kakaisip ng paraan para mabalanse ko ang mga things sa buhay ko. haha. kakainis dba. weh. si shane kse eh. weh. haha. ay nako, cge na nga, matutulog na lng ako..ang sarap magpakabatugan ngayon..umuulan. zzzzzzzz.

vavay! :)

2006-08-18T02:24:00.000-07:00

buti naman tpos na exams. grabe, makakatulog na ako ng mahimbing ngayon. pero hindi rin. second qtr na, i really need to focus this time. first qtr was quite hard for me. pero i understand myself kse syempre moment yun para mag- adjust. sa first qtr ko rin napatunayan kung sino yung mga true friends ko. sa first qtr ko rin nalaman na pamatay ang geom. sa first qtr ko rin napatunayan na simple lang buhay, babagsak kung minsan, pero kelangan mong matutong bumangon....at lumaban. sa first qtr ko nalaman na may mga tao pa lng naniniwala sakin. doon ko rin nalaman na hindi lng dpat puro saya nararanasan ng tao. dito ko rin nalaman na fighter din pala ako. o ha! grabe! ang saya pala nung feeling na may mga taong handang dumamay sayo. sa school year na to, 3 beses na akong umiyak. the reasons are not too deep pero i have reasonable reasons to cry. anyway, hindi ko naman hobby ang umiyak kaya hndi ako umiiyak pag walang dahilan. this is my fight, and i am dealing with this life. hindi ako duwag and i would continue this battle no matter what it takes me. i don't know what life has in store for me, pero kahit anong mangyari, i would fight..and eventually survive. ganun lng ang buhay. so pls, sa lahat ng mga nawawalan ng pag-asa, magdasal lng kayo kse nakikinig tlga Siya. i mean, i am not the kind of person na mala-madre ang kabaitan, pero i ma very, very, i mean, very sure that i have this good relationship with the Lord. at this point in my life, i have realized that prayer can really move mountains. as an example. okay. i can honestly say that i suck when arnis de mano (PE) goes to the scene. i become a total loser when arnis de mano gets in contact with my hands. and i don't know why. and because i truly suck in arnis, i have to practice, i mean practice hard, i mean, PRACTICE really hard. and of course, i pray. sobra, if hardwork and prayers go together, mangyayari yung gusto mong mangyari. dun sa practical test, wala akong mali. see?sa simpleng bagay na tulad niyan you can prove that God really does exist. at hindi lng sya nag-eexist, He's actually watching over us, and guiding us at the same time. tama yung sabi ni kaye lacio (good friend of mine) na *God will make a ways when there seems to be no way*. i actually got inspried with the song. and syempre, inspiration ko rin si kaye kase she gives me the *power* to move on with my life kahit na nakakandarapa kme sa nangyayari sa third yr. pero as i've said nga, life is not just about having fun. kelan din ng challenge. thir yr is a challenge. HAH.

2006-07-29T05:53:00.001-07:00

Dear Diary,

How come this day is so weird?

This day is not really like the normal days I have spent.

2006-07-29T05:53:00.000-07:00

Dear Diary,

How come this day is so weird?

This day is not really like the normal days I have spent.

2006-07-23T21:42:00.000-07:00

life is fun :)

long weekend. HAHA.

2006-07-06T02:38:00.000-07:00

I am tired. Everything went fine naman the whole day. Not for the fact that I almost cried again. Eh basta, may isang tao kasi na feel daw niya na ayoko sa kanya. Wala akong ginagawa but that person feels that I don't like her. Haaaay.

Anyway, masaya ako ngayon.

*If you feel sad, just pray and talk to God. Tell Him everything that makes you feel sad because He will always be there...He listens, yet not shown. :)*

2006-07-04T02:08:00.000-07:00

Lately, things aren't turning good for me. Things are actually killing me. I have been telling my problems to my close friends but it seems that I cannot move on. Though my friends are there, it seems that the world is no longer turning right for me.I am down. Definitely down. I cried this day because it felt like I cannot hold on anymore. I wanted to cry on to my friends' shoulder, and so did I. I wanted to let them know that I am not okay, and so did I. I have done the things that a down person does when things aren't going well. I wanted to have fun, and so did I. After all the good times, come the bad times that can kill me literally. I cannot explain the pain I am feeling right now. I want to move on, but it seems that my feet are glued and cannot help itself to move on. I always tell myself that things are going to be alright. I always tell myself that God plans for something good for me. I can't help but ask myself, or even God when is that day going to take place?After all, I still believe that I would get over what happened. Babawi ako. Yun yun. I just can't help but think about the things, or must I say possibilities that could happen. It just makes me feel sad when I think about the worst things that may come. I can't make an excuse from being so sad these days and I am not blaming myself from being so down. After all, I have the reasons to cry. I have the reasons to get hurt and feel helpless. People see me crying most of the time. They end up making conclusions about what happened. I can't balme them from being so curious about the reasons why I cry, or just the fact that they see me cry. It just makes me feel better when I cry because that is my only way of telling my friends that I need them and that is my only way of telling them that I need their help. I just want to make it easier for myself. That is why I love to cry these days because I am down. That's that.To Kaye: You just don't know how I have loved you more. Grabe, sa ginawa mo kanina, sobrang I felt better. I love you, Kaye.A while ago, we had a meeting. An officer-adviser conference. Everything went fine.

* How can I escape from this sadness?

2006-06-30T21:48:00.000-07:00

So today was our physical fitness day. Everything went fine naman. I signed my name for patintero. LOYAL eh. Loyal. So there, after nun, we went to Karakuch. Kain kain sandali and went inside the school to play Truth or Dare with Beloi, Hannah, Bea, Sara, Preshy, Espi, and Patbu. Ang saya saya guys. I really had fun with you. Mahal ko kayong lahat. But my love is nothing compared to Beloi's love for Bartolome. I don't even know where we got that name. Actually, kilala naman niya sarili niya eh. Eh basta. After 30 mins siguro ng paglalaro, we went to our bus. Sumabay si Beloi and Sara sa bus namin kasi they have some stuffs to buy. So ayun, bumababa kaming apat nila Hannah, ako, Beloi and Sara sa may Mcdo. Nagtake-out kami ni Hannah tapos nagpahintay kami sandali sa bus namin. Yung dalawa, dun na nagpaiwan, tapos kami ni Hannah, umuwi na kami. Ang saya namin kanina sa bus kasi kung ano anong kalokohan pinagkukwentuhan namin. Until I found myself laughing to death na hindi ko na mapigilan talaga. Ang sama sama namin talaga kanina. Tapos yung mga ibang 2nd year, nage-gets rin nila kaya tawa rin sila. They were nice naman kanina. :)

Tapos ayun. Kinakabahan ako sa Geom quiz on Tuesady. Pero babawi talaga ako. Talaga. :)

*Don't get too tired of being sad. Get tired of choosing the things that would make you happy*

*It is hard to fake things.---tamaan ka.*

2006-06-29T02:19:00.000-07:00

geom quiz was really hard..uh, i mean..for me. ewan ko sa ibang gifted sa pagiging math whiz.

i am really tired because we did a lot of things today. anyway, i had fun. as what patty said, she's pretty much contented and stable this time. maybe i am feeling the same thing. nothing beats the stress of third year. oh wait, did i just mention stress? HAH. stress kung stress, sanay na kami dyan. actually, masaya na rin naman ako kahit minsan i find things hard to learn. eh ano? i don't have any choice, and if i just have a choice, lilipad ako ng malayo para lumayo sa stress. eh pero pwede ba yun? i have to deal with everything that is happening. ganun talaga eh, kasama yan sa paglaki. Hindi pwedeng duduwag duwag ako. Lalo na ngayon na I must set a good example to my classmates. hindi pwedeng ako yung nangunguna na mahina ang loob. ayoko naman ng ganun diba. i want to make things perfect, or if not, i want to make things exciting for my classmates. :)

medyo natamaan ako dun sa discussion namin kanina sa CL. yeah, freedom. nag-recite ako tapos sabi ko..*freedom is not an excuse for you to cover up for the evil things you have done. freedom. HAH. *bow*

masama lang talaga loob ko kanina.

pero eto, okay na rin ako. wala naman akong ibang dpat gawin kung hndi mag-smile. :)

masaya na ko..bsta andyan lang kayo..(kagitingan) yehes. :)

masaya na ko, bsta makita ko lng na masaya din kayo..haha. okay lang ba ko? oh yeah, i am okay. :)

that's that..

life is like an ice cream. life is sweet. life can melt. haha. labo.

2006-06-28T02:35:00.000-07:00

this day is freakin tiring.

UGH. we will be taking a lot of quizzes tomorrow. UGH. OH come on. Geom, Chem, English, CL, Computer. SAN KA PA DIBA.

2006-06-27T02:25:00.000-07:00

So today's a normal day. Ang daming quizesssss inaaaa. Eh wala naman akong choice diba kung hndi aralin lahat yun.. oh well, haaay.kakapagod. :)

2006-06-21T03:42:00.000-07:00

Epal epal epal epal epal epal epal epal.

UGH. EPAL.

I hate this day. I hate THIS DDAAAYYY!

2006-06-21T03:12:00.000-07:00

This day gave me a lot of reasons to smile. Masaya, sobra. *sarcastic tone. HAH* Unang una, ano tong kaepalang nangyayari sa amin ni Krizia ngayon? We are not okay. We know deep inside that there is something wrong going on our 8-year friendship. Pangalawang kabalahuraan na nangyari. Aba'y ang dali naman ng Geom. *syempre, sarcastic ulit*. Isa pa, hilong-hilo na ko..yeah, literally and figuratively. Feeling ko talaga bulag na bulag na ko. Ano ba kasi naman. Ugh. Aba'y tama ba namang kasing luambo mga mata ko? Eh hello diba diba diba, third year nako so that means that i need my eyes for me to read, read, and read. Uh, i hate reading books. UGH. Pang-apat, kanina, nakalimutan kong maglinis sa classroom. So, uhh..strike 2 na ata to kay tinrob. Sorry tinrob, ubos na brain cells ko kakapuyat. Sisihin natin ang mga brain cells kong tatanga-tanga. I mean, sige sisihin mo ko. :) Pinaalala pa niya talaga sa kin na ako magwawalis ngayon..pero ano??nakalimutan ko.. *Palakpakan*. Pang-lima, kanina pagkatapos ng club, nagpunta kami ng CR ni April (bday girl tom). Pagkatapos ng paglalagalag sa maganda naming CR, aba'y kumanta si April ng Day by Day. Di ko rin maintindihan. Bigla bigla na lng. Mukha siyang ewan dun..Ginawa niyang rap yung kanta.. So ako naman na tuliro sa mga pangyayaring naganap, takang-taka na parang ngayon lang ako nakarinig ng taong kumakanata. Pang-anim, sa bus kanina, hilong-hilo na talaga ako. Ewan ko ha, basta pag nakasakay na ako sa bus namin, nahihilo na lang ako bigla. Ang labo diba. Pangpito, wala akong rason para mag internet ngayon pero eto na naman akong nagmamagaling sa harap ng pc at nagsusulat ng napakawalang kwentang post. May quizzes kmai bukas pero akala mo kung sino akong matalino na hindi nag-aaral. Medyo wala ako sa sarili nitong mga nakaraang araw. Siguro dahil sa mga nangyayari. Hindi ko matanggap ang mga kahinaan ko. Masakit todo. :(

*salamat dahil naiintindihan mo ako*----sana marinig ko ulit yan sayo. :(

2006-06-05T02:22:00.000-07:00

So today is the first day of my junior year. First day is over. OVER. I have lots of things to say but my time is not enough. It's running, so I have to chase my it. Ugh.

Kuya and I are okay again. I even slept to his room that same day. Hah.

I won't post for a week. Hate it.

Ugh. Junior year is here.*swoosh*

My nametag sucks. Really, it sucks.

2006-06-01T22:30:00.000-07:00

Okay. Today is not my day. Kuya and I just had a fight. I couldn't believe that we're not talking to each other for about 30 minutes already. Oh no, I can't..I just can't take it. Oh well, I think I could patch things up with him when he's already awake. Yeah, I am talking to the walls again because he's having his peaceful sleep.

Change topic. *swoossh*

I have just started reading the book entitled *Tuesdays with Morrie*. I borrowed it from kuya just before we ended into a senseless fight. The book is great..really great I mean. I love Mitch Albom so so.

I have been blog-hopping for 1 hour now and I started to think how techie people are nowadays. Everything's online now. Thanks to eBay by the way. haha.

Okay, you also noticed that this entry doesn't have a specific topic? Yeah, we're both thinking the same thing. Nice one, buddy. :)

I don't know, it's just that my mind is flying again. There are a lot of things that keep me thinking. I can't even sleep and rest because things are pasted on my brain. As if my brain is working.Hah.

Okay, I better try to sleep first. :)

*Life is not just about having fun.*

2006-06-01T19:09:00.001-07:00

I miss everyone. Nadine, wake up. Wake up. Monday na. Oh shoot, muntik ko ng makalimutan na Monday na sa Monday. Medyo magulo ba? Bahala kayong umintindi. Excited na kinakabahan na naiinis na nalulungkot. Yun yung pakiramdam. Laban ka?

2006-06-01T19:09:00.000-07:00

I am in love. I have fallen for a genius. His name is Mitch. Yeah, Albom. Mitch Albom. :)

2006-05-31T21:23:00.000-07:00

TRAGEDY!

I have just finished eating my lunch. Before I decided to use the internet, I saw my pictures when I was still a freshman. I saw that everyone has changed a lot. My friends from Diwa, are still my close friends so I can say that we've grown up really fast. *Sigh*. I have realized that time has flown so fast, without me noticing it. Oh well, before I forget, I had this so-called *techie tragedy* before I have entered my blog. You know, the unusual stuffs that are going on while you're being so peaceful sitting down in front of the computer. Yes, I had this tragedy that made me cry...almost. I don't know. I just have the not-so-good feeling when something happens to our computer and it just makes you feel stupid because you don't know what you're going to do. Did I just type stupid? Oh yeah, I did mean that. Just because of my recklessness + lack of common sense + stupidity, I sometimes forget to watch over what I'm doing . In short, my mind is flying.

I accidentally pressed a key on my keyboard, and my monitor turned plain black. In short, it turned off.Hah. I opened it again. I went online and surfed the net. The next thing I knew was I was in the middle of a techie tragedy again. The window just got bigger and the taskbar became invisible. I didn't know what I am going to do so I asked my friends. Thanks to Millet and Elka.

*I don't wanna be techie anymore. Mamamatay ako sa kaba*

2006-05-31T18:27:00.000-07:00

Eh bsta. Gusto kong magtagalog ngayon. Naiinis lang ako sa mga taong walang magawa. Ang feeling nila. Naiinis ako. Tapos yung nararamdan ko na inis, may kasama pang kaba. O diba. Ang ganda ng pakiramdam. Kinakabahan ako kasi malapit ng mag Monday. Meaning, malapit na kong pumasok, gumising ng maaga, at malapit na rin akong magkaroon ng maraming problema. Sounds Stressful? Well, it doesn't. It sounds harmful to my health. As if iindahin ko pa yung health ko diba. Hello. Ang pangit ng lang ng pakiramdam na ganito. Lahat ng pangit na feeling nasalo ko na. Malungkot pa rin ako up to now, without even knowing the reason for my damn sadness. Ilang linggo na rin akong ganito, and I haven't found the reason. O diba, nakakainis yung ganun. You're sad because of something you don't know. Kahit anong gawin kong paghagilap sa lecheng rason na yan, ayaw niyang magpahanap. At isa pa, yung inis na to, hindi pa rin matanggal sa isip ko. Hindi matanggal sa akin. I just have to release this feeling or else baka hindi na ninyo ako maabutang buhay. Oh well, I'm not planning for a suicidal attempt. Hindi ako ganun kababaw na magpapakamatay sa isang taong wala namang puwang sa mundong to. Naiinis lang ako aksi pareho yung lugar na ginagalawan namin. Paano ba to diba. Ayokong ipakita sa kanya na naiinis ako pero parang nangingibabaw lang talaga tong pakiramdam na to. Na parang gusto kong sabihin sa kanya na *Alam mo, naiinis ako sayo kaya pwede get out of my life!*. Hindi naman pwedeng ganun gawin ko diba kasi ang pangit naman. At isa pa, kanino ko naman sasabihin yan eh hindi ko rin alam kung kanino talaga ako naiinis. Basta. Feeling ko nga may sakit na ko kasi kung ano-ano nararamdaman ko. Eh anong gusto nilang gawin ko, tawanan lang lahat to, imposible yun no. Hindi ako manhid kaya normal lang na maramdaman ko yung mga bagay na ganito. Walang makakaintindi sa akin. WALA. Walang wala. Sarili ko nga hindi ko matulungan diba. I just told myself a while ago na I'm one of the most pathetic people existing. Pero at least diba, kaya kong tanggapin yung mga bagay na to. After all, naisip ko na hindi ako pathetic. Not at all. Parang there's an empty space sa sarili ko na pilit kong gustong lagyan ng laman eh pero wala rin nangyayari. Kung ano-ano sinasabi ko diba kasi kung ano-ano rin pumapasok sa isip ko.

Kanina pagkagising ko, naisip ko na paano kaya kung hindi na ko nagising. O diba, ang ganda, pinapatay ko sarili ko. Pero hindi eh, gusto kong mawala lang kahit sandali para mawala na tong feeling na to. Mawala. Eh sang lupalop ng mundo ako pupunta para lang takasan tong nararamdaman ko diba. Eh wag no, itutulog ka na lang. Tatangkad pa ko kasi nakatulog ako. Nakakainis. Pinipilit kong tumawa, pero walang nakakatawa. Dito nga sa bahay pag lahat tinatawanan ko sasabihin nila na napaka babaw ko. Eh bakit ba diba, kung talaga natatawa ako. May magagawa ba sila. Anyway, wala naman talaga akong problema eh. Wala talaga. Tapos na-feel ko na parang hindi lahat totoo yung mga sinusulat ko. Screw my feelings. Ayoko namang mawalan ng pakiramdam. Ayokong maging manhid no. Gusto ko maging normal. Ang sama lang talaga ng gising ko. Pano ba naman kasi, ang pangit din ng araw na to. Eh basta. Magpapakasaya na lang ako. Tapos kanina I felt like singing, so kumanta ako. Eh anong napala ko? Wala. Kaya itutulog ko na lang to.

*I am smitten by something*

2006-05-30T22:41:00.000-07:00

This is my last entry for this summer.

Bye summer! Hello school days:)

I have lots of things to do so I better do them instead of blogging.

Vhoy!:)

2006-05-30T03:49:00.000-07:00

Nadine was
a Happy Gladiator
in a past life.

Discover your past lives @ Quiz Me

2006-05-30T00:49:00.000-07:00

Things I learned from my idol (Albert Einstein)

~Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.

~Great spirits have often encountered violent opposition from weak minds.

~Most teachers waste their time by asking questions which are intended to discover what a pupil does not know, whereas the true art of questioning has for its purpose to discover what the pupil knows or is capable of knowing.

~Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school.

~Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.

~It is better for people to be like the beasts...they should be more intuitive; they should not be too conscious of what they are doing while they are doing it.

~Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile.

~The tragedy of life is what dies inside a man while he lives.

2006-05-29T18:12:00.000-07:00

I LOVE YOU. SO SO MUCH!

Last night, I read the entry of Tin. Tin and I actually used to share stories of our kuyas because both of us are blessed with an older brother. Now, our difference is that she has seen her brother die. I have told her a hundred times that if that thing would happen to me, maybe life would not give me reasons to live. Knowing that we both have a good relationship with our brothers; that made me think that I have to let kuya see how important he is to me. This isn't my first post about this matter, but I just can't refuse from putting myself into Tin's situation and imagine that I am the one who is in Tin's place. Well, I guess, life would not be the same if that would happen to me as well. How I wish it won't because it would surely kill me. Kuya has been there for me all his life. I mean all our lives. He's older than I am, and that is why he has watched over me all his life. Sometimes, we fight over some petty things, and that is one reason why we are really close than anybody else could ever imagine. I don't know why I am so affected of her brother's death, but maybe because I have a brother, too. Yeah, same age, same interests (playing the guitar while facing the computer, looking for tabs on the net). See? Exactly like my brother. I just wish that they won't have the same fate. I won't live a normal life if I won't have him all my life. Kuya and I also share a lot of stuffs like our problems and other things that would just enter our brains. I don't know how happy would my kuya be if he would just visit my blog and some of my entires. Madalas siya yung bida eh. (I told him to look at my blog but he told me that blogs are absolutely not his thing). Well, because of everything that had happened, I am trying to be a better sister to him. I want him to proud of me. Kasi diba, who knows if something bad might happen. Baka ako or siya yung mawala. So to make things special for the both of us, we both make the most out of everything.

There was this time that kuya wasn't staying in our house due to the fact that his school was a thousand kilometers away from our house, haha (he studies in UST High School). It felt like I was really missing something or someone in my life. After all the conclusions, I finally knew that it was kuya whom I was missing. Good thing that he already goes home everyday, and that thought somehow makes me happy and strong because he's with me all the time. You can't change the reality that siblings are meant to announce World War III sometimes, and we also do fight like any other siblings. Fights are normal to us, and we do not even have to say sorry because he (kuya) would just crack some of his jokes and that would make me laugh really hard. I don't know how to see things like kuya does because he really is a positive thinker. San ka pa? Complete package diba? He's a singer, a guitarist, a composer, a writer (of poems and anything that could be written, haha), an actor, a dancer, a basketball player, and the best kuya in the world. All I can say is that I am really lucky to have him. Oh yeah, he's luckier.

2006-05-29T00:11:00.000-07:00

Once again, this day is boring. June 5 is fast approaching. Yeah, June 5-Monday-First day of 3rd year life! Okay, what else?Time to meet new friends.Ang boring talaga.Pati tong post na to boring.So if you're reading this, better quit. NOW. Boring.I am listening to my brother's songs again. I can't deny the fact that he has the voice. Proud sister? I am. (Proud, i mean). Since the opening of classes is near, I am preparing for stuffs, but haven't gone to the mall yet to buy shoes and other things. Maybe this weekend will be the time for that. Oh well, before writing this post, Ate Pex, my super hot cousin showed me a picture of a really hot guy. Maybe that guy is her male counterpart. This guy that I am talking about is really, really, really HOT. Don't get me wrong because he isn't my crush. Not at all. Masyado siyang hot. So there. After looking for the guy's piture in my cousin's blog, I decided to read her recent entries. I kept on laughing because her entries were so funny. The funniest blog I've ever gone to. And then I finally realized that she isn't the Ate Pex that I've known when we were still kids. Not that I am saying that she became worse or something, but she transformed into a hottie-funny bitch. Ewan ko ba, basta she likes it when people call her bitch.Female dog siguro siya sa past life niya.Di naman siguro haha, joke lang cuz! Love you!

Before visiting my blog, Precious Estimo chatted with me. The reason? Oh well, to fool around with me again. haha.

I just noticed, the word of the day: AGAIN. (ang weird ng mga pangyayari)

*IINGATAN NA LANG IMBES NA LIMUTIN*

2006-05-28T00:09:00.000-07:00

from friendster.

Dahil sa sobrang boring ang araw na to, survey survey muna tayo!

1.saan ka naghayskul?- NAGHAYSKUL means past. NAGHAHAYSKUL supposed to be. Anyway, SHS.

2.maganda ba dun?- OO naman.

3.anong kulay ng bolpen ang lagi monggamit?- I love to use black ballpen. PILOT ha.

4.parasite ka ba?- parasite nga ba ko? minsan.

6.nagpapakopya?- That's what friends are for, isn't it? Pag di ka nagpakopya all your life, pangit highschool life mo. Kaepalan tawag dun. Gahaman! haha.

7.nagdadala ka ba ng sarili mong papel?- Minsan. Marami naman akong friends kaya may supply ako. :)

8.nasa top 10 ka ba ng klase?- Ewan ko.

9.sino ang pinakaayaw mong teacher?- Honestly, I hated, hate, and will always hate the man who sang *Grow Old Wittchu* haha. Basta alam niyo na yun. :) Bad girl. :))

10.e pinaka-favorite?- Madami. Ms. Casimiro, Mrs. Santos, Ms. Platon (my idol), Ms. Aniago (kasi sobrang di siya pikon!) SANDIGAN, remember the line: Miss mayaman ka po kasi kaya kahit na anong bagay na madikit sa balat mo, mahal na. :) ( I said this line in one of our Filipino class) haha.

11.pinakaayaw mong klasmeyt?- Basta meron. Alam na nila yun. :)

12.anong subject ang may highest grademo?- yung magandang subject. HEALTH. LABAN?haha.

13.lowest subject?- madami. BIOLOGY, MATH, MUSIC. (laban kayo sa MUSIC?haha)

14.sino ang crush mo during those days?- crush? nung high school di na uso sa kin yun eh.

15.ano ang theme song mo sa kanya?- theme song theme song pa.

16.fave events?- fair.field trip.intrams :)

17.saan ang paborito mong place sa klasrum?- sa may harap. dun kme nagla-laugh trip :)

18.natutulog ka ba sa klase?- di naman. BASTOS ha. huwag ipakita ang kababuyan.haha :)

19.favorite mo ba ang PE?- okay lang. softball and swimming :)

.20.may swimming pool ba kayo sa skul?- san kaya kami lalangoy?

21. oval?- wala ehh.

22.basketball court?- meron naman.

23.naisip mo na bang sunugin ang skul niyo?- minsan. kasi tinitipid ata kami masyado. :(

24.nagprom ba kayo? sinong partner mo?- hindi pa. partner? wanted: prom date.

25.may nakaaway ka bang teacher?- wala naman no. ano ba yun pati teacher kinabog.haha.

26.ano ang pinakamamimiss mo sa HS?- lahat naman ehh. masaya ang high school! :(

27.worst kalokohan nung hayskul?- eh di kopyahan. natural lang yun eh.

28.greatest regret?- yung worst kalokohan. :(

30. anu-ano sections mo nung HS?1st yr-DIWA :)2nd yr-Sandigan :).

Saayyaa sumagot!

2006-05-27T19:57:00.000-07:00

I went to mass this morning with my whole family. I woke up early, had a quick shower, opened the closet, and grabbed the perfect outfit for this day. I wore my worn-out pair of jeans, a simple shirt, and then flats. The mass was okay, until someone went close to me and gave me a rose to be offered to Mama Mary. It made me feel upset, honestly. Why? All the other people that offered were kids. Oh come on. I am an incoming 3rd year student, not a grade 1 kid! Hello! But that was okay anyway. Some, as in some, were in their teens as well.

Yesterday was a blast. Remember the pairs of earrings I thought I've lost? Haha. They're back again. I found them. Nice. I found them in my cabinet.

So there.

Almost done with my world map! haha.

http://www.friendster.com/naadeenvee

click!

2006-05-21T17:44:00.000-07:00

I went to Claret yesterday as I've said in my recent post. Tin is okay, but not really that *okay*. Bsta, I can't explain the pain in her eyes.It's been 3 days since Andrew died and they (the family of Tin), is feeling the pain even more. *It's hard to lose him cause we're really close*sabi ni tin sakin. *I can't imagine life without a brother kaya starting today, I would love my kuya even more* I told her. *Tell him not to ride a car anymore!* Tin said. *Gagi ka!*I said.*Thanks for being here and thanks dahil naiinitindihan mo ko* she said. *I love you Tin, you know that, don't you?I said. *Of course, I do. Same here. Thanks ulit.* She said.

*it's hard to lose a brother*--> this line made me imagine life without kuya. God, I can't. Mamamatay ako.Mahal na mahal ko si kuya, mahal na mahal.

I'm going to Ilocos so I don't thik I can post everyday. Anyway, I will have fun.haha

*LOVE YOU KUYAAA!!!!!*

2006-05-20T18:40:00.000-07:00

I just came home from the hospital.Yesterday, Tin Mate texted me that her kuya, Andrew just passed away. Mahirap tanggapin, pero ganun talaga. I will go to Claret later to see Adrew's remains. I would go there to comfort Tin. I love you Tin.

to tin: stay strong for your parents ha. your kuya is now resting. andyan lang siya tin. hindi siya umalis sa tabi mo. Andrew will always stay, forever and ever. He's now in heaven, watching over you.He's now happy..wala na siyang pain na nararamdaman. He's now HOME..with the Lord. Love you tin.

2006-05-18T18:37:00.000-07:00

I just got enough of sleep last night. I woke up at around 9:30 am, and went straight to face the computer. Hello, it's vacation that's why I could do everything that I want to do. Pagbigyan.HAH. Yesterday wasn't a great day. Not at all. First, I lost my two pairs of earrings, and one of those was given by my mom. I haven't told her yet that the pair of star (STARRR!!!) earrings she gave me when I was in grade 5 isn't with me anymore. The worst thing about that is, that pair of earrings is my favorite, my lucky charm, and my only star. How sad. Second, Trixie, a good friend of mine texted me yesterday that the brother of Tin Mate, a good friend of mine as well, has met a car accident. The worst thing about that was I just woke up and read the message that someone was unconscious. Yeah, someone. I barely understood the message of Trixie because I was still in a state of dreaming ( because I just woke up) and shock. I texted Trixie back and asked the whole story, but she didn't know the things that went on. To the family of Tin Mate, we're praying for Andrew Mate. Our family hopes for his safety. To Tin, dapat maging strong ka for your kuya.

I am hoping that this day would be much better than yesterday.

Sana makapag-online pa rin ako mamaya at bukas! I have to go to the hospital tomorrow!

LOST IN SPACE. HAH.

2006-05-18T00:08:00.000-07:00

I am listening to my kuya's compositions. Every song I hear is really good. Well, my kuya's really a great composer and writer. That is our big difference. I can relate to every song he wants me to hear..and judge. That's the advantage of our closeness.

I like a line of one of his songs. Here it goes: "Iingatan na lang ang mga alaala imbes na limutin." It's so sad. I mean, the song is really sad.

I'm done with everything that I have to do today. Here's my checklist:

* Done with memorizing countries and capitals of North America.
*Cleaned my room.
*Covered and labeled my notebooks.

Ayan. Masyadong nababalutan ng love songs ang bahay namin ngayon. Masyado kaming senti dito.

Life is really fun. But of course, I would never forget the other side of life. Yeah, sadness and failures. Failures. Pain. kaya nga ang senti namin dito. Though were not in pain, kuya and I love to hear love songs.yung para bang love songs na lng lahat.Ang sayyaaa! I want to go to school already! I want to see my friends, and have new sets of friends as well. HAH.

LOST IN SPACE. *HAH*

2006-05-17T19:45:00.000-07:00

Past is past. I just cannot understand why some people, including myself, dwell on the past so much.

I have been through a lot of things in the PAST, and I can say that my PAST is my KEY to my present. I read this book (THINK BIG) last night that made me realize that I must not listen to people's beliefs. What beliefs? Beliefs like the line "PAST is PAST".

So there. I am so, so tired. My mind is tired. My body, my whole body is tired. I am tired of memorizing stuffs like the world map, the periodic table of elements and such.

Last night, I couldn't sleep again. My brother was still awake at 12 midnight, and so I decided to sacrifice the wee hours of my sleep (supposed to be). I wanted to sleep late.Practicing for third year life. HAH. I went down stairs and saw that my kuya's eyes were still open. So I told myself, "takte kung kaya niyang magpuyat ng ganyan, mas kaya ko no!". HAH. Sounds competitive? Asan yun competition dun, first and foremost? HAH. Competitive in what way?I was competing for the title, "SINONG MAS MALAKI ANG EYEBAGS, SIYA'NG CHAMPION." Honestly, while typing this post, I am laughing at myself. This is so weird. So,so weird. I can't even understand what I'm typing. Maybe because my eyebags cover my eyes. Takte pano yun? Sa sobrang laki, pataas na siya kung tumubo. HAHA.

NOTHING ELSE....BUT SADNESS

2006-05-17T01:24:00.000-07:00

2006-05-17T00:42:00.001-07:00

Just finished covering my books. No matter how hard I try to cover my books perfeclty, they always turn out to be the messiest things that I've ever seen in my entire life. Not that I am making this thing a very big deal.As usual, I am listening to my brother's voice again. AGAIN.Yes, again.It's not that bad, anyway. I am writing this post not just for the sake of writing and adding. Oh well, before I started typing here, I received a message from my cousin, Ate Anne. Here it goes:

What Oprah says about men:
If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't nothing can keep him stay.Never let him know everything about you, because he will use it against you later. He is a man, NOTHING more, NOTHING less. You should never look for someone to complete you because a relationship consists of two whole individuals.

What a nice message, though I can't relate.

If Oprah is really telling the truth, the line *YOU COMPLETE ME, HONEY*, isn't true at all.I've always thought that being in love is as easy as sitting down on a couch, grabbing the remote control on your right hand, and having a bag of popcorn on your lap. I guess love isn't as easy as I've thought. All this time, a lot of my friends are sharing their not-so-happy ending of their relationship with their loved-ones. Of course, the never-ending IM's and texts follow.Of course, the yes-it's-ok lines won't end as well. It's just now, and yes, only NOW that I have realized that I should not take things seriously as a lot of people do.

At this point in time, love for me is a piece of paper that can be torn by the tears of the one who is in pain.

>>Ate Arianne, if you're reading this post, you're one of those people who are sharing their not-so-happy ending. Stay strong.andito lang ako. :)

yehay!

2006-05-16T22:12:00.000-07:00

AT LAST.WHEW.

I CAN'T SLEEP

2006-05-16T08:21:00.000-07:00

I am having a hard time getting myself into a peaceful sleep.I don't know why.I have been reading stuffs all day long,and I think that is the reason why my body system couldn't shut down all at once.What stuffs?Stuffs like Chemistry book, Trigonometry and the killer..HELLO GEOMETRY.hindi naman sa kinakarir ko, pero gusto ko lang mapadali buhay ko.So I decided to start memorizing stuffs.It's late.Very late.For my information, it's already 11:30, according to my clock.Every minute of this summer break is fun.Fun because I have broken one rule.*YOU CAN' STAY LATE ON THE COMPUTER...i mean, ONLINE.*.So they mean I can stay late on Microsoft Word.THANKS.HUH.HAAH.